neitherheavenorhell:

_{“‘Swing Set Needs Home,’” I said.
“‘Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,’” he said.
“‘Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,’” I said.
He laughed. “That’s why.”
“What?”
“That’s why I like you. Do you realize how rare it is to come across a hot girl who creates an adjectival version of the word pedophile? You are so busy being you that you have no idea how utterly unprecedented you are.”
I took a deep breath through my nose. There was never enough air in the world, but the shortage was particularly acute in that moment. We wrote the ad together, editing each other as we went.
In the end, we settled upon this:
Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home}